Sunday, 29 April 2012

An Analogy

A strong, solid tree with deep roots will neither break nor be uprooted when a strong wind blows. A weak, fragile tree with shallow roots will either break or be uprooted when a strong wind blows. It is therefore not necessarily a bad thing for strong winds to blow.
Likewise, a solid house with solid foundations and a flimsy one with flimsy foundations: one will easily survive an earthquake, the other will not, and let not the earthquake be blamed for helping us distinguish the solid houses from the flimsy ones.

Friday, 13 April 2012

How Smart My Smartphone Is



This is how smart my smartphone is. 

It can compose text messages in Korean, Urdu, Siamese or Vietnamese which unfortunately I can neither read nor write.

It can also compose text messages by utilizing either one of two different types of keyboard or a handwriting detecting pad.

It also goes into power saving mode when set to activate anywhere from ten to seventy percent remaining battery strength.

It can also guide me from point A to point B on opposite sides of a bustling metropolis through a maze of inner city streets and avenues simply by telling me where and when to turn.

It also stores the history of all sent or received messages between sender and sendee in chat bubble format.

It can also pinpoint my exact location on earth as seen from outer space.

It also tells me who’s calling when calls are received or when messages are received, what time it is whenever it wakes up from sleep and reminds me at the same time of the number of missed calls or unread messages that are still unattended to.

It can also take photos like a pro, with a range of settings to choose from including comic book type effects.

Of all the countless smart things it can do, what it cannot do is switch off the light when it’s time to go to bed, but I‘m sure it’s figuring that out even as we speak.






Monday, 19 March 2012

This Is My Hell And Here I Rot



This is my hell and here I rot
For one of the gods, alas, I’m not.

A god doesn’t fall and break his bones
Or acquire kidney stones.

This is my hell and here I rot
For one of the gods, alas, I’m not.

A god doesn’t suffer heartache and pain
Caused by people with half a brain.

This is my hell and here I rot
For one of the gods, alas, I’m not.

A god doesn’t suffer old age and death
Brought on by chest pains and shortness of breath.


This is my hell and here I rot
For one of the gods, alas, I'm not.

A god doesn't break down like buses or trucks
Or need fixing for hundreds of bucks.

This is my hell and here I rot
For one of the gods. alas, I'm not.

Tuesday, 28 February 2012

Systems Dynamics: America's Best-Kept Secret



   According to a Macmillan business book entitled  The Stuff Americans Are Made Of  by Josh Hammond and James Morrison, in what’s called The Orange Grove Experiment, a typical science class assignment for twelve-year-olds in a certain school in Tucson,  Arizona, is plotting the ideal location for a nuclear power plant in four south-western states according to criteria such as water supply, distance from populated areas, terrain requirements, workforce, seismic fault lines, emergency escape routes and so on with the help of a computer model.

   A typical math class assignment for twelve-year-olds in the same school is using a hypothetical credit card to pay hypothetical bills and buy hypothetical necessities or otherwise within credit limits while maintaining a payment schedule involving percentages, decimals, interest rates and penalties.

   To add to the excitement, students get fired from hypothetical jobs so as to make the task of maintaining a good credit relationship with their hypothetical creditors even more challenging.

  Elsewhere, in a class the authors used to call ‘civics’, students hold mock jury trials or town council meetings to discuss raising local taxes to rebuild the town hall while in other classes computer models are used to experiment with simulated versions of literary works such as George Orwell’s Animal Farm or study the mechanism of biological systems or dog-eat-dog relationships in the wild.

   And all of this in a school for eleven-, twelve- and thirteen-year-olds!

   Equally revolutionary is the way chewing gum once disposed of the usual way is no longer a problem for the school’s janitor and the existence of some sort of a group buddy-buddy system that helps students cope even with the loss of a family pet, let alone other more serious personal tragedies, domestic traumas or emotional upheavals.

   Revolutionary stuff indeed and all of it based on what’s called a systems dynamics approach first conceptualized by Professor Jay Forrester of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology and applicable to any system from corporations to classrooms, even domestic households.

   The school this systems dynamics approach was first adopted and implemented is the Orange Grove Middle School in Tucson, Arizona, and by the time the Hammond-Morrison book was published in 1996, it wasn’t the only school – elementary, middle or high – in Tucson or elsewhere in the U.S. smitten by the systems dynamics concept.

   How much more of the U.S. was there that has been similarly smitten by this dynamic concept at school level since then I personally didn’t know at the moment, but the point is, based on additional information gleaned from the book concerned, my calculations are the U.S. has had at least a ten-year head start in this matter.

   Woe betide the rest of the world – developed, still developing or under-developed – if my calculations are wrong and the U.S. has had more than a ten-year head start regarding the issue at hand.

Copyright 2000 Thomas L. Carlos

Saturday, 18 February 2012

Limericks, Anyone?

There was a young lady from Leeds
Who nurtured her garden with seeds;
She watered and trimmed
And slogged till she slimmed
But all that did blossom were weeds.

There was a young student from Spain
Whose project was 'What Made It Rain';
She wrote in a book
Which I had a look,
'The fog needs to clear in my brain'.


There was a young lad from Tahiti

Whose passion was spray paint graffiti;
He wrote on the dome
Of St. Peter's in Rome:
KABUKAKALIKAKALITI.

Wednesday, 8 February 2012

The Child Prodigy Theory Of Reincarnation


(states that)


Child prodigies are reincarnated individuals whose exceptional skills or abilities in any particular field were acquired in a previous life or accumulated over a period of multiple lifetimes and are thus exhibited at an early age upon rebirth.


Sunday, 22 January 2012

Tips For Suicidal Road Users

1. Do not slow down when approaching traffic light junctions 
    and the light is about to change from green to red.  Nah, 
    that's for wimps. Step on the gas and heaven have mercy   
    on whoever's stupid enough to believe red means you're 
    gonna stop dead even at 120 mph. Continue stepping on 
    the gas should the wail of police sirens be heard behind 
    you shortly afterwards, and once they pull up alongside as 
    normally happens, unless of course you're in a Ferrari or 
    one of its categorical cousins, (a) wave a bogus doctor's    
    bag and yell, "Emergency! Emergency, you dolts!" (b) flash 
    a bogus undercover cop's badge and yell,"Pursuing 
    suspects! Pursuing suspects, you clowns!" (c) flash a bogus 
    government official's ID card and give them that haven't-
    you-idiots-better-things-to-do look.  If nothing works, let's 
    hope you're in a Ferrari or one of its categorical cousins 
    should such a scenario be forthcoming.

2. Do not wait for the light to change from red to green at 
     traffic light junctions and you're in pole position. Nah,    
     that's also for wimps. Step on the gas and to hell with the 
     consequences should any be forthcoming. Deal with 
     wailing police sirens in the manner recommended above 
     should any be forthcoming too.


3. Do not waste time looking for u-turn exit points or other 
     legal direction-reversing means in the event there's none 
     conveniently located as is generally the case at traffic light 
     junctions. Nah, that's also for wimps. Make u-turns 
     anywhere at will especially where none are conveniently 
     located and to hell with the consequences should any be 
     forthcoming, Once again, deal with wailing police sirens  
     in the manner prescribed above should any be 
     forthcoming too. Should you also get honked at as a result 
     of any of the above stunts, do not only honk back - that's 
     what drivers acquainted with each other do all the time 
     upon passing each other. Let fly also with a hand gesture 
     of any insulting or defiant sort, preferably emphasized by 
     verbal accompaniment.


4. Do not waste time looking for designated parking lots or 
     bays when needing to park at your desired destination or 
     momentarily stop somewhere. Nah, that's also for wimps. 
     Pull over and stop or park anywhere at will regardless of 
     parking space availability or legality or cop presence. A 
     favorite spot is by the roadside just after exiting a junction 
     of any sort, alongside blind corners or other parked 
     vehicles regardless of their parked positions, butt sticking 
     out or otherwise. Deal with cop interference or blaring 
     horns in the manner outlined above should any be 
     forthcoming too.

5. Do not waste time looking for overhead pedestrian bridges 
     or crossings when crossing roads on foot. Nah, that's also 
     for wimps. Cross roads anywhere at will regardless of 
     traffic conditions or cop presence. A favorite method is to 
     wait in the middle of the road after crossing one side and 
     then crossing the other side from there. The same 
     technique is to be employed when crossing multiple lane 
     roads or highway segments. Highly recommended for 
     people with a strong death wish. Suggested background 
     music - The Death Waltz In C Minor.