Friday, 1 August 2014

Observations # 1

Women are basically playmates men typically tire of after a while in favor of new playmates preferably young and rejuvenating to the senses.

Thursday, 17 July 2014

A Directive Concerning Forbidden Activities III

I. Directive:

From this day onwards, this seventeenth day of this seventh month in this two thousand fourteenth year of our Lord, you, No Name, a.k.a. Olga, being the only surviving child-bearing female pussycat left in the entire clan, are hereby forbidden from indulging in the following activities, so help you, God:

1) Going missing like the others before you which you too had a habit of doing in the past on more than one occasion.
2) Dying from something or the other like the others before you.

You may come and go as you like as before but always be reminded that the future of the entire clan rests on your ability to bear offspring.

Finally, you are also hereby required to acknowledge the above by imprinting your paw print in the space provided below.

Thank you.

II. Acknowledgement:



 

 ……………………………………….
No Name, a.k.a. Olga
Sole Surviving Child-Bearing Female Pussycat In The Entire Clan
17th July 2014


Wednesday, 16 July 2014

A Directive Concerning Forbidden Activities II

I. Directive:

From this day onwards, this sixteenth day of this seventh month in this two thousand fourteenth year of our Lord, you, Scamp, a.k.a. Big Boy, being the only other resident pussycat left in this household, are hereby forbidden from indulging in the following activities, so help you, God:

1) Going missing like the others before you which you had a habit of doing in the past on more than one occasion.
2) Falling sick and dying like the others before you, your bad cough of late notwithstanding.
3) Getting killed by a dog or car like the others before you.

You are also hereby required to acknowledge the above by imprinting your paw print in the space provided below.

Thank you.













………………………………..............
Scamp a.k.a. Big Boy
Only Other Surviving Resident Pussycat In This Household
16th July 2014







Thursday, 19 June 2014

Word Definitions

road [rohd] noun : a paved pathway upon which motorized vehicles zoom past each other in opposite directions in excess of sixty miles per hour within inches of each other. 

Sunday, 8 June 2014

The Mathematics Of Adultery

Here's how it works.

When a man and a woman are joined in flesh through sexual means, a flesh bond is created. As long as both parties remain faithful to each other, that flesh bond remains pure. Should it so happen that either party becomes unfaithful by having sexual relations with a third party, thus committing an act of adultery, that flesh bond becomes contaminated, or adulterated, from which the word 'adultery' is derived. Should it so happen that the faithful partner, whose half of the flesh bond incidentally still remains intact and untainted, decide to leave the unfaithful partner for someone else and joins himself or herself in flesh to that person by sexual means, no adultery is committed on his or her part as the person he or she was previously joined to in flesh by sexual means defiles it the moment he or she joins himself or herself to someone else in his or her moment of unfaithfulness. In other words, the faithful partner is no longer joined in flesh to whoever he or she was previously joined to the moment the unfaithful partner joins himself or herself in flesh to someone else.


Wanna know how many times you've committed adultery? Easy. Do the math.

Friday, 6 June 2014

The Legacy We Leave Our Children

We teach our children it is all right to tell lies by doing it ourselves. We teach them that acts of killing and violence are all right from the movies they watch and the video games they play, perhaps even enjoyable. We teach them that war is all right from the wars we fight at home or abroad. We teach them that divorce is all right from our own divorces or multiple divorces whichever the case might be. We teach them that extra-marital affairs are all right from our own extra-marital affairs,  thus ensuring the continuity of the cycle of life as we know it, perhaps even to the extent of going to war to defend it, this godless lifestyle of ours which our children grow up believing to be 'normal'.
This is just the tip of the iceberg.
What about pornography? What about prostitution? What about gambling? What about narcotics, all of which we permit to flourish by fair means or foul?
We teach our children it is all right to break traffic rules, and when we get caught, that it is all right to bribe traffic cops into looking the other way.
We teach our children it is all right to poison our lungs with tobacco smoke and livers with alcohol, not overnight of course but in the long run, by being exemplary role models in these areas, and we teach them that when they pay the price in the form of lung or throat cancer or cirrhosis of the liver twenty years down the road that it is one of those 'normal' illnesses 'normal' people fall victim to all the time, depending on one's luck or the roll of one's dice - fate as some might call it.
Good teachers, are we not?


Saturday, 24 May 2014

Words Of Wisdom

Generosity, like musical virtuosity, is a gift. Not everyone is born with it.