The Festive Firecracker Issue

Explosive firecrackers are officially banned in Malaysia. However,  good politics necessitates that the law looks the other way when it comes to the various festivities celebrated by the various communities - Eid al-Fitr (Hari Raya Puasa) by the Malays, Chinese New Year by the Chinese, Diwali (Deepavali) by the Indians -  for the sake of not jeopardizing, theoretically, the Malay vote, the Chinese vote or the Indian vote which will indeed be the case should the authorities come down hard on each communal group for detonating explosive firecrackers each time its respective festivities comes along.

The practice of detonating explosive firecrackers during festive seasons originates from the Chinese who, during Chinese New Year, detonate explosive firecrackers to superstitiously ward off evil spirits which is the reason the Chinese do it year after year since the days of their ancestors.

What reason, then, do the Malays and the Indians have for doing it when their respective festivities come along? Surely not to superstitiously ward off evil spirits too, right? What then are their reasons? A herd mentality? Revenge? Lack of parental guidance? Lack of relevant schooling?

This is the scenario in modern-day Malaysia, a nation that recently turned fifty-five but behaves like a five-year-old, a five-year-old who does not understand right from wrong, what's banned from what's not banned, what respecting your neighbor's right to peace and quiet is from what respecting your neighbor's right to peace and quiet isn't.

Or perhaps it isn't an age issue at all. Perhaps we just need to come down from our tree houses and move into the city dwellings provided for us. Is the concept of being a civilized people so difficult to grasp? Being born Asians doesn't mean we cannot behave like we were raised to be lords and ladies, noblemen and noblewomen, princes and princesses, kings and queens.

My kids are still awake. It's almost one in the morning but they're still awake, too terrified to shut their eyes and sleep for fear that the next bomb explosion-like explosion will blow them to bits.

I tell them it's not a war zone that we're in. I tell them, no, war between us and neighboring Thailand is  not being waged. I tell them we're living in the midst of a primitive, tribalistic, culturally backward people who've never come across a festive occasion before in their lives and, having now done so, are behaving accordingly. My kids are confused. They've seen the people I'm talking about wear modern-day clothes, not the garments of tree or cave dwellers.

The funny thing about kids is, the one word adults employ to describe other people which they have no problem whatsoever understanding is this one word: stupid, which is what I end up telling them everybody out there making our lives miserable is, which seems to help, somewhat, between the thundering explosion-like explosions we're shaken out of our skins and deafened by.
It's a good thing we're on good terms with Thailand, because if we weren't, now would be a good time for them to launch an attack. By the time the real explosions were sorted out from the fake ones, it would all be over. The tide of battle would be in the aggressor's favor.

Now wouldn't that be funny? 

Thrill Of The Kill

Man's fascination with acts of killing as exemplified, even glorified, in movies, video games, wildlife documentaries, actual battlefield footages and so on reveals his true nature.

For this reason wars will always be a way of life on earth, let alone lesser acts of murder and mayhem.

Famous Quotes

"It is said, never a lender or a borrower be. However, if you  must, better a lender be, as dishonorable borrowers, whom most borrowers are,  have given borrowers a bad name." - Anonymous

CO Emission Alert

We Malaysians are not from a deprived background, the way we compete with each other in the race for having the biggest house in the neighborhood or the flashiest car on the road. Our lust for such status symbols stems from materialistic impulses, hence streets choked to overflowing with CO-emitting cars.

Generally-speaking, the Chinese are materialistic by nature. So too the Indians. The Malays are not, but, sadly, they've begun acquiring such habits as a result of close proximity with their more affluent neighbors, hence streets even more choked to overflowing with CO-emitting cars.

Interestingly, the Dutch in comparison are the exact opposite.   In Holland, the wheeled status symbol is the humble bicycle, hence streets totally uncluttered by congestion of any vehicular sort.

Not only that. No one can accuse pedal power champion Holland of being an active contributor of vehicle-generated greenhouse gases which in turn contributes to global warming, rising sea levels and chaotic weather patterns.

If each one of us is guilty of abetting the ultimate suicide of Mother Earth directly or otherwise, forensic evidence will reveal no Dutch involvement at all in this respect.

Unfortunately, the day Mother Earth dies, so too will the innocents, and that is the real tragedy of it all.

Dance Of The Cobra

Come away, my friend, come away.

The one you seek is a seductress.

He who lays eyes on her is swayed by her charms.

She smiles, and he is enslaved by her beauty.

She winks, and he is hooked.

The fish had taken the bait. Time to reel it in.

Come away, my friend, come away.

The one you seek is a temptress.

She lures victims the way sirens lure sailors towards the rocks,

Towards a watery end.

They see the rocks, but the sirens are too alluring,

Their appearances too seductive,

The promise of paradise and soft flesh too strong to resist

Unlike the hardness of the jagged rocks which are unforgiving

As both sailor and ship soon find out.

Come away, my friend, come away.

The one you seek is a sorceress.

He who gazes upon her is hypnotized by her charming ways.

She smiles, and he is enchanted.

She winks, and he is mesmerized.

The prized calf has been lassoed. Prepare the cooking pots.

Florence Nightingale In Glittery Robes

Your glamorized brand of charity work is too sugar-coated for my taste buds. It reeks of pomposity. Is the left hand supposed to know what the right hand does, or vice versa? Yet you shout it from the rooftops that the whole world might know of your so-called charitable works, for it makes you look good on your resume, as well as on the front cover of People magazine. That's all you care about, how good it makes you look in the eyes of society, judging from your growing photo collection whose central figure is a glamorized-looking you. 

This is what bored Millionaires' Club wives do to pass time and look good at the same time. Congratulations, and welcome to the club.

To Be Taken With A Pinch Of Salt

When death occurs, it is nothing personal. It is purely business, the business of cleaning house, for life is not eternal. It has a limit, and when that limit has been reached, death occurs in the manner pre-ordained.

It is nothing personal, and is therefore not to be taken personally especially when it involves a loved one. We tend to blame ourselves as if we brought it upon ourselves or upon our loved ones, whichever the case may be.

Take heart. It is nothing personal. It is purely business, the business of life and death, from the moment the spark of life is created to the moment the flame it ignites is snuffed out.

Nor is the manner death occurs to be taken personally. It is only a matter of pre-ordained selection from a vast range of available options, all of them specifically designed to ensure death occurs as intended, in some cases violent, in others slow and lingering, and in yet others, quick and painless.

There is no escape. We can only hope the manner of death pre-ordained for us was somehow influenced by a moment of compassion at the time of its selection.

My cat is dying. It hasn't eaten for six days now. It appeared to have caught a simple bout of flu at first but now it's quite apparent its liver is failing. How do I know that? My dad died of liver problems and I was his nursemaid during his final days.

Anyway, if it's nothing personal, if it's purely business, this business of heaven cleaning house here on earth, WHY THE BLOODY HELL AM I TAKING IT SO BLOODY PERSONALLY!!!???